The following are incidents in which Adam "Pacman" Jones, or people allegedly associated with him, have been involved since the Tennessee Titans drafted him in April 2005. There is only one charge pending against Jones.July 13, 2005: Two weeks before training camp is scheduled to begin, Jones is arrested by Nashville police at Titans headquarters. He is charged with assault and felony vandalism stemming from a nightclub altercation.
Sept. 5, 2005: Six days before the season opener at Pittsburgh, Jones attends the annual Nashville Sports Council Kickoff Luncheon. Later, Jones has a loud, verbal tantrum when told he must wait in line for his vehicle, according to witnesses. He does not pay for valet service.
Oct. 25, 2005: Five days before the eighth game of the season, it is alleged by the state of West Virginia that Jones has violated the terms of his probation, going back to a suspended sentence after a barroom brawl during his freshman year at college. A judge extends his probation 90 days.
Feb. 6, 2006: Jones is arrested in Fayetteville, Ga., and charged with possession of marijuana. He is handcuffed after throwing a punch at an officer, according to police, and charged with a felony count of obstruction and two misdemeanors of obstructing police. The drug charge is dismissed in January 2007, although his mother Deborah and a friend, Marcus Bowens, are convicted of possession of marijuana. Jones will appear in court later this month to face the obstruction charges.
March 23, 2006: A Fayette County drug task force SWAT team serves a search warrant at the Georgia home Jones bought for his mother. When Jones steps out of his Corvette, a drug investigator notices that the car reeks of marijuana. Jones admits to police he has been smoking and that it will be several weeks before he is able to pass a drug test.
April 18, 2006: According to Nashville police, who cite surveillance camera footage, Jones is one of 12 people gathered at a gas station when a fight breaks out and gunshots are fired.
Aug. 25, 2006: Jones is arrested in Murfreesboro, Tenn., for disorderly conduct and public intoxication. At the Sweetwater Saloon, he is accused of assault by Toya Garth, who says Jones spit in her face and she spit back. A judge sentences Jones six months probation provided he stays out of further trouble.
Oct. 26, 2006: Jones is cited for misdemeanor assault at Club Mystic, a Nashville nightclub, where he allegedly spits in the face of a female college student. He is suspended for one game by the Titans, on Nov. 5 at Jacksonville.
Feb. 19, 2007: Jones is present when an early morning brawl breaks out at Minxx Gentlemen's Club in Las Vegas. Three people are shot. Club co-owner Robert Susnar claims the shooter -- still at large -- acted on Jones' behalf. Jones denies this. No charges have been brought against Jones.
So what is the state of the nation? Not good, I'm afraid. If you look at that map, you just want to weep for the shambling bags of meat that used to populate a nation that was lean and hungry for success. We have a population that is bloated and ready to pop sideways out of a defective pair of Wal-Mart shorts. We have entire towns and villages full of howling upright carcasses that are ready for permanent boneyard residency. This was once a nation where strong men and women walked for days on end just to find a piece of land that wasn't screwed up so they could build a life for themselves. What happened to the American dream? It's dying of neglect. It's a belly full of garbage. It's an over-salted hot mess. It's the end of an idea that I think still has a lot of life left in it. Fortunately, there are people like me, and I will never let the American dream die. I'll help you get back on track. All you have to do is walk. I am an evangelist for walking, you see. I know eating right and exercise matter. I know Oprah has been telling you to eat cookies or bake potato chips in your $5,000 oven or whatever, but look at Oprah. She won't even climb stairs (no idea if that is true or not). I'm telling you--walk. Don't worry about the other stuff. Don't sweat the small stuff. You have shoes? Go walk. If you don't have legs, or if you can't walk, them amble along any way you can. Use your walker, your wheelchair, your crutches or your hovercraft and just go places. See things. Breathe. Walk. Live your damned life, sir. What does it cost for me to tell you this? Nothing. I have no books to sell you. I have no "advice" guide for you. I'm Norman Rogers. You should go walk. Okay, our transaction is done. All I collect from you is the moment it took you to consider my advice. I don't want your money. Tell you what--you take your money and you buy walking shoes for you and yours. Take your money and spend it on you. That's what I'm selling--I'm selling you the idea that you should take care of yourself with your money. Don't give it to anyone who can't give you something useful (like a good pair of walking shoes). Don't send me your money because I don't want it and we have no way to accept it. That's right--you should take your money and keep it. There. How hard was that? Walk like the dickens. Make that map at the top of the page shrink away. Build a log cabin somewhere. Cut the grass and dig a hole for no reason. Eat something you found or grew or fished out of the water. Live, dammit, live. 
Fatass Nation
